the final day

Today was my last day at Garvanza Elementary School. I was busy up until the last minute cleaning up the room and filling out the necessary paperwork. My students have been telling that they will miss me all week. Even the boy with the attitude problem started being all nice and polite. We were okay until it was time to leave and then some of the girls started crying. I just couldn't hold it in anymore and ended up crying with them. After the kids left, I said my goodbyes to co-workers and that was hard too. They told me to visit and keep them posted on my life. It hasn't really hit me yet that I won't be going back to work. I am feeling relieved and a little melancholy.

the sassy girls in my class 

the cool boys in my class 

Saying Goodbyes

Yesterday started out sad. I started out the day by saying my goodbyes to a coworker who greets me everyday with a cheerful good morning. I had planned on telling my students that I wasn't coming back yesterday so it was on my mind all day long. Even our read aloud book had a parting scene and I actually choked up and teared. I told the kids right before we left for home and they were pretty sad. They told me they were going to visit me everyday when they went to fourth grade and I believe some of them since they still visit their first grade teacher everyday. They would go visit their second grade teacher everyday too if she were still here. I don't know why I always get so attached to my students. It makes saying my goodbyes that much harder.

Trying New Things

Work life after Open House has not slowed down a bit. In fact, the stress level just keeps on rising due to last minute final tests which we didn't have last year and the normal end of school year paper work such as cums, report cards, ELD portfolios, registers, etc. All this on top of trying to clear and clean out my classroom and keeping the students busy. I've had a headache everyday this week. Although today, I am finally feeling like I will be able to get everything done on time.

Last night was the only enjoyable time I had this week. I went to my first oil painting class. My teacher is Kt Boyce. I like her because she's very free spirited. She wants to help us do our own art instead of enforcing a rigid curriculum. It was my first time ever oil painting and I had a great time. I was so excited that I had a hard time falling asleep. Of course, it didn't hurt that I came home after class and watched my weekly episodes from Naruto and Bleach.

Mission Possible

My dad is in Mexico right now on a short-term missions trip with his church. They left Chicago last night. They're doing community services type of work there. I was a little surprised. I remember when I needed my dad's permission to go on a short-term missions trip to Africa, I had to work on him for six months. We progressed slowly but surely from me just getting yelled at to discussions to the final gracious permission of, "Fine. Do whatever you want." My how things have changed. God is definitely working in my dad's life and I'm so excited for him!

Awards Assembly

Yesterday we had our last Super Stars Awards Assembly for the year. I'm one of those teachers that give out an award to every student in the classroom throughout the year; the really well behaved and hard working students first and then the others later on for improvement in various areas. I guess I believe that there's something in every child that should be recognized and celebrated with others.

Well, yesterday two of the students who received the awards had never gotten an award before in their school career. I gave all the students receiving an award a letter the day before to invite their parents to the assembly so they knew ahead of time that they were getting one, but their reactions were touching. When the first boy's name was called, he got this sheepish grin on his face and sauntered his way up to the front of the auditorium. He looked proudly at his parents who both managed to make it even though they're now separated. When the second girl's name was called, she covered her wide open mouth with her hands as she gasped with genuine surprise. Then she put one hand on her chest with the other arm stretched out to the side as if she was going to faint. Finally, she looked at me with wide eyes and pointed at herself and mouthed, "Me?" I nodded in affirmation and she finally proceeded to the front. The whole class was happy for them.

The girl talked about the award all day long. "I've never got an award before." "My mom is going to be so happy when she sees this." "What do they do at the special party for the award winners? What do they eat?"

I was reminded of how I need to be more grateful for the little things in life that God blesses me with. Not thinking that I deserve them.

Done

Open House came and went last night. I got home after 8PM after a long exhausting day. I've been consumed with getting ready for Open House for the past two weeks or so and have lost touch with the rest of the world: No time to check emails, barely enough time to call people back, no time to watch TV, etc. All the effort paid off last night. Everyone was pleased; the parents, the principal, the assistant principal, the coaches, and especially the students. Watching the students proudly show off their work around the classroom to their parents and siblings made all the hard work worth it. They were beaming. They were the true stars of the evening and I was glad.

Even though I stilll have two more weeks of school left, I feel a sense of closure. Now it's time to start packing up and leave the teaching world for awhile.

Overworked

I'm so tired today. I've been staying late at work all week to get ready for Open House. I'll probably have to come in this weekend as well. I don't know why I care so much since I'm not even coming back next year but I do. It's my pride as a teacher I suppose. I've also been having to wear long sleeve shirts all week to cover up the fake tattoo I got at the City of Hope picnic I went to last Saturday. I seriously didn't think it would last this long and tattoos are a no-no at our school. Our principal has already asked all the teachers with tattoos to cover them up. So I'm tired and I'm hot.

e e cummings

I've grown to appreciate e e cummings' poetry in the past year so I decided to read a book by him. I chose his six nonlectures to read over the Memorial Day weekend. I'll be quoting from the book the next few days.

"Let me cordially warn you, at the opening of these socalled lectures, that I haven't the remotest intention of posing as a lecturer. Lecturing is presumably a form of teaching; and presumably a teacher is somebody who knows. I never did, and still don't, know. What has always fascinated me is not teaching, but learning."

I also feel this way, that I don't know. I also enjoy learning. I hope to be a life-long learner.

"Works of art are of an infinite loneliness and with nothing to be so little reached as with criticism. Only love can grasp and hold and fairly judge them." (from Letters To A Young Poet by Rainer Maria Rilke)

Any form of art always seems to be critiqued by others which makes it frightening to even attempt anything sometimes. Love seems so much more kind.

Final Evaluation

I had my final evaluation with my principal this morning. I wasn't nervous or stressed at all for this one. I felt prepared and knew that I had met my goals for the year. She liked everything I was doing with the students and it was nice to have my hard work acknowledged. Someday I will have the ultimate final evaluation with Jesus. Will I be prepared for that one?